A four-year-old who refuses to get dressed in the morning, another seven-year-old who breaks down in tears in front of a reading exercise: these everyday situations raise a concrete question for parents. We often seek answers in major educational theories, while the most effective levers for your child’s development are found in precise, sometimes tiny, adjustments in daily life.
Screens before three years: what the French regulation changes since 2025
Since January 2025, the health booklet given at each birth in France explicitly includes the guideline no screens before three years, including background noise. This recommendation is now on the same level as other pediatric health guidelines, such as dietary diversification or vaccinations.
Since July 2025, a ministerial decree has modified the conditions for childcare centers to prohibit exposure to screens. We are no longer talking about a simple parental recommendation: it is a regulatory framework that applies to collective structures.
In practice, this means that a baby or toddler should not be exposed to a tablet, a phone, or a television turned on in the room, even if the program is not intended for them. The resources offered by Mon Enfant Un ! allow for exploring concrete alternatives, such as sensory games or manual activities suitable for each age.
Applying this rule requires revisiting certain habits. Turning off the television during meals, storing the tablet out of reach, offering a bin of objects to manipulate when a few minutes of calm are needed: these actions replace the screen without creating a void.
Fostering autonomy in children: starting from what they already know how to do
Autonomy is often associated with big goals (dressing alone, doing homework without help). The practical approach is different: observe what the child already masters and expand from there.
A three-year-old who can hold a spoon can start pouring water from a small pitcher. A six-year-old who puts away their shoes can prepare their school bag if provided with a visual list. The principle remains the same: identify the acquired skill, add just one additional step, then consolidate before moving further.
Signals that show we are going too fast
When a child consistently gets angry at a task, we have probably skipped a step. Feedback on this point varies according to the child’s temperament, but a reliable indicator remains the repetition of opposition: if it occurs three days in a row over the same activity, we need to take a step back.
- The child gives up in less than a minute and moves on to something else: the task is probably too complex for their current level.
- They ask for help at every step when they succeeded alone the previous week: an external factor (fatigue, change of routine, stress) disrupts their concentration.
- They succeed but categorically refuse to try again: the task poses no technical problem; it’s the repetition that bores them. We can vary the context or presentation.
Emotional management: naming without minimizing
In front of a crying child, the most common reaction is to quickly reassure them (“it’s nothing,” “stop crying”). This response comes from good intentions but cuts short the emotional process.
Naming the emotion with simple words helps the child recognize it. “You are angry because your tower fell down” works better than “calm down.” We do not ask the child to stop feeling; we give them a word for what they are experiencing.
The difference between validating the emotion and giving in to the demand
Accompanying your child’s emotions does not mean accepting all their behaviors. We can say “I see that you are very frustrated” while maintaining the rule (“we do not hit”). Validation is about the feeling, not the act. This distinction, easy to articulate, requires consistency to become a reflex.
A concrete tool: after a tantrum, revisit the episode a few minutes later with an open question. “What made you angry earlier?” allows the child to verbalize retrospectively when the emotional intensity has subsided.
Daily activities and self-confidence: the role of micro-successes
Parents often think of extracurricular activities (sports, music, arts) to develop their child’s confidence. These activities have their place, but the micro-successes of daily life build a more stable confidence.
Preparing a vinaigrette, watering a plant, folding a towel: these actions may seem trivial. For a four or five-year-old, each represents a tangible proof of competence. The result is visible, immediate, and the child can reproduce it alone.
- Choose a task with a concrete and observable result (the plant is watered, the towel is folded).
- Do not redo the task behind the child, even if the folding is approximate. Review discreetly later if necessary.
- Emphasize the effort rather than the result: “you took the time to pour the water well” rather than “it’s perfect.”
- Increase complexity in spaced increments, not every week.
A child’s self-confidence is not built during a one-off workshop. It is consolidated through the repetition of small victories rooted in real life, day after day.
Recent French data on the mental health of young people show that a notable proportion of middle and high school students report nervousness and feelings of depression. The work on confidence begins well before adolescence, in these family routines where the child learns that they can act on their environment. Parents who integrate these adjustments early lay foundations that neither school nor extracurricular activities can replace alone.
